Somewhat Sane

Out of my five closest friends, two are straight men. All three of us have partners, but honestly, that’s irrelevant for my argument. Having these two male friends has helped me see men as whole human beings in their own right, with hopes and heartbreak, fears and aspirations. I believe my presence in their lives has done the same for them. We don’t see each other as potential romantic partners, and this has allowed us to look at the opposite sex from a different lens – a lens that has no agenda. It’s just individuals hanging out together. Just… being.

When Neelam (Shefali Shah) from Dil Dhadakne Do sees her husband Kamal (Anil Kapoor) flirt with another woman on their anniversary, she goes to her room and gobbles up a slice of cake. No, she stuffs her mouth with cake, trying hard to not break down. This was one of the most memorable moments of this hard-hitting movie, and that’s because it’s all too real. Like many women, the stress of her husband’s many indiscretions pushed her to seek pleasure and relief from food. Although temporary, this sense of pleasure is exactly why we tend to eat when we’re stressed.

Google was able to throw around 29,60,000 results in just 0.58 seconds when I searched for ‘managing teenage mood swings.’ And it took me precisely that amount of time to skim through the top 10 results to know that most parents, like me, are clueless and searching for answers in the ethers. Sometimes search doesn’t help but experience does.

The word ‘phubbing’ is made of two words – ‘phone’ and ‘snubbing’. Phubbing is when we snub someone we are sitting with in person in favour of the phone. It’s become so common to do this – at parties, at dinners, on date nights, while hanging out with friends and family, and even on Zoom calls – that we almost don’t question it.